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Relationship Column: Why Do We Do It?

Alex Parker

            You can sense “bad news” from someone the moment you meet them. We’ll take this from my perspective; just about the instant a guy walks up to me, it’s like a billboard over his head that reads, “I am bad news. I will absolutely hurt you.” You try as hard as you can to resist his impeccable charm. Eventually, you find yourself captivated by it; you cannot withstand it. Girls are not the only ones susceptible to it, my male friends have affirmed that they can sense it too.

So why do we do it? If you can sense harm, even emotional harm, from another person just as you meet him or her, why don’t you run for the hills? Trust me, I wish I had the answer for you. I think every girl has to survive one ignoramus before she really learns her lesson; as much as we can give out advice about relationships, we can never seem to take our own.

You start out strong. At first, your instinct tells you to do the right thing and you can withstand their wit. Eventually, it becomes so difficult that you give in and go out with them. I’ve found that people that have big egos do not take well to being turned down, so they are very persistent. At this point, it’s all over. Their charm takes hold and you’re a goner; wave goodbye to any and all sense of reason.

It only seems to get worse after that. You will put up with whatever craziness these people begin to throw at you. There are times when they show you that they are capable of being these amazing boyfriends/girlfriends and that’s what you begin to hold on for dear life. No matter what they do or say, it won’t matter, because in the back of your mind, you know that this person is able to be better. But honestly, how much is too much? Where do you draw the line?

We are inclined to want to fix people. Is that a part of it? We want to stay with this person under the allusion that we will turn them into this magnificent person that we want them to be. At this stage in our lives, we should all be aware that we can’t change people; they are who they are. However, I am confident in the fact that a lot of people will not take this advice until they are literally at their wits’ end with their significant other, myself included.

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